Janis Joyce Nathan JAMS

Back up that attitude

A

B

Y

S

T

E

P

S

No one is coming

I climbed the stairs alone

I was scared

But no one knew

I didn’t complain

I cried

and I cried

Because no one

was coming

And the plastic

big blue duck

just stared through me

But no one is coming

He was a little comforting

But I want the big brown teddy

that was for the baby

No one is coming

You don’t deserve it

You were acting rebellious

You were angry

You wanted

your grandparents

no one is coming

I am stilling hoping with each tear

Someone is coming

JJN 9/10/2026 03:04 AM

The world is a flaming torch seen in outer space and they are preparing to watch us be obliterated. To quote an idiot.

JJN 8/31/26 High Noon.

Is peace safe?

When grief shows up

The door cracks opens to

The fear factor guest

what if?

How will I do?

oh no ?

what can I do ?

Am I prepared ?

The answers pop up

like chaos again

Be vigilant with your focus

Don’t let fear fly the plane

peace is the best pilot

But the passenger thoughts

can be disturbing

close the door

to overthinking

We cannot change the past

we cannot predict the future so

we have to live in the now

Before we miss it

JJN 7/7/26 many moons ago 11:30pm

we live inside

There’s a window we look out

We see ourselves out there

We wonder why we are not

We have a prism

The colors glow but we are behind the window

The house encloses and embraces us

We dwell in all the rooms

We are living the life

Of our husbands

We are inside

They are outside

When they come inside

They get anxiety

We respond with fearfulness

The window watches everything

The sun peeks in

The flowers call our name

But we are not women

We are wives

Of the window husband

We dare to open the window

and feel the breeze

We wander to the door

And throw it open

We are the women in the

windows

jjn 2/5/2026 2:03 AM

we live inside

There’s a window we look out

We see ourselves out there

We wonder why we are not

We have a prism

The colors glow but we are behind the window

The house encloses and embraces us

We dwell in all the rooms

We are living the life

Of our husbands

We are inside

They are outside

When they come inside

They get anxiety

We respond with fearfulness

The window watches everything

The sun peeks in

The flowers call our name

V

But we are not women

We are wives

Of the window husband

We dare to open the window

and feel the breeze

We wander to the door

And throw it open

We are the women in the

windows

jjn 2/5/2026 2:03 AM

What for?

lack of cooperation and communication

how long?

many noons and moons

how much?

buckets full

recurring dreams

haunting

disturbing interruptions

triggering

debilitating symptoms of

remorseful guilt

repenting shame that leads to

resentful anguish

denial of selfishness

No self ~accountability

deep deep waters of

drowning memories

depressing news bites with

distinct divergence

a bracelet of recurrences!

da stink of it all!

jjn 10:07AM 9/8/2025 GARDENSIDE

I am fighting to understand

who you are

you are fighting

me

I am struggling

to be closer

As you push me away

I am abandoned

without you

And lonely with you

I am afraid to be myself

While you are trying

to control me minutely

I am in a cage

You keep shaking it

With intentions of

upsetting me

Chaotic communication

Cruel words of

revenge or rage

The limits of time

Erasing my memories

Who are you ?

Who am I ?

What does it take to

stop the spiral?

jjn 1:16pm 9/2/2025

Most people like

the sunshine day garden

but nighttime brings new

dimensions and discoveries

A squawking crow in the palm

a hummer on the power pole

Who came down to see me

on my bench

3 sparrows on a wooden wall

My Ms Skye in her den

with gramma’s brown towels

The sun was sneaking down

behind my garage

The mourning dove

flew over my head

landed on the wall and

stopped down to the grass

The dog watched

The clouds were whipping up

a breeze around my face

The pinwheels and sunflowers

moved when they were

interested in showing off

The milkweed

was asleep in the dirt and

they were secretly

waiting to pop up

JJN 7/28/2025 Evening

Sounds like a bucket list

Well what’s in your heart of hearts

HAWAIIAN VACAY

Canada Italy France Spain and England

Australia

travel on a river cruise

Get healthier

Renew facial skin

Visit friends

Help Raise grands with fun trips

Gramma she shed to enjoy my last years

jjn